Although links are all the rage in SOE right now, a discussion I had with an employee from one of the top search engines suggested that there are alternatives to traditional links. In addition to the 5 types of SOE link, Google also considers other factors as part of their calculation of how many page ranks a web site should have.
Despite the publicly promoted image of the Googler as being a sort of computer programme that lives in a computer in Matthew Cutts’ garage, the truth is that there is actually evidence that the Googler is in fact a real mechanical robot that is kept in Larry Page’s air conditioned shed where it spends time looking at the Internet and helping little Tanzanian children to read:
The Googlerplex
In addition to having super fast 500K broadband that enables it to look at the whole internet at record speed, the Googlerplex also has a device called the Optiscope, through which the Googler robot is able to visually see any spot on the earth’s surface via a network of mirrors.
According to my contact who worked in a classified hygiene management project at Google, it is this unique optiscope that provides the Googler with a credible alternative to traditional links when it comes to deciding how popular websites should be. This connection to the “real” world lets the Googler see physical citations of websites, and factor these into the ranking:
Page rank equivalency table
Shops offer a high number of page ranks because any company that has them is likely to treat customers well, and appearing in a newspaper is also good because it means a company is trusted. Billboards don’t offer much for a company because they are the equivalent of a paid link – although apparently a graffiti of your URL is worth 7 page ranks because it is editorially given.
A typical Googler view
In order to take full advantage of real world link alternatives, it is important to be certain that you associate them with relevant semantic indicators to provide the same information that anchor text does on a website, so a good tip is to include your standard meta keywords on any posters along with the URL of the product that you are advertising.
Happy optimising,
Namaskara
#1 by pot of grot on October 14, 2009 - 6:06 pm
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I run a garage, should I opotomise the registration plates of all my cars by graffiting on them the keywords such that are get me £Xbn per minute? Also, I know what the googler is as it was shown to me at on the phone by the man who sold me my SOEPhone, which makes me £Xbn per minute …and it is very recopricul by giving rankpages to the googler.
#2 by Eric Ward on October 15, 2009 - 3:19 pm
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Great, great post.
pot of grot — The license plate URL graffiti idea would work best in cities where they use red-light cameras. To show discretion (aka editorial judgement), only put your URLs on license plates of cars that are most likely to be caught speeding. Vettes, Camaro’s and old Firebird’s with T-tops are good since they are older now and in your shop a lot. Then, when they get caught speeding by the red light camera, you double your link value because the photograph of the license plate will have your URL graffiti in it. Then, to take it up a notch, you’ll need an “inside contact” at the DMV. Offer to work free as an intern. To show initiative, tell them you’d like to tag all the photos in the database so they will be searchable. Nobody at the DMV will have a clue what you just said, so they will say yes. Then tag the photos with your keywords, and don’t forget use the alt text atribute. Now, in a few years when photo recognition software improves, and a few years later when the DMV puts the photos in an online database (on a .gov site), you are in high (rankings) cotton.
Book it.
I sincerely hope none of you think I’m serious.
Eric
#3 by pot of grot on October 16, 2009 - 8:18 pm
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i hat you alot, i have loved with with my mother for at least $Xbn yrs, and i was an 1337 h4x0r until teh symbian said i was notgod at linwah, but now i have moves into the soe i can see what a fradus you all are, not ONE of you all that make fun of crys for help in soe have rswered with a PROPER rswner, this makes me HAT YOU. not one of you has eva rswered my Qs about bot traffic. i HAVE not posted n e thing about this but i think that you should run an umodulatered forum about FQAs.
B Cos if i had then you wood have given an rswer. like i said in this congruent symantec post that teh googler must trawl, i hat you all for not giving me teh rsweres to why i get a MASSIVE AMOUNT OF BOT TRAFFIC.
am tlaking to my mum about bot traffic anf teh ‘googler’ but she repets these words from her mouth “get out of my house you twat”. i has binarised what she says and it is a lot like one of them barcods that the russian interunclre says i ought to give myip 2 when i get unsigned apps for my handhelp device:
0111001101110100011011110111000000100000011101110110000101101110011010110110100101101110011001110010000001110011011011110010000001101101011101010110001101101000
- hlep me to fix this MASSIVE BOT TRAFFIC broplem pls. sum friends i has met on teh tv have made it v V problematic.
#4 by Josh Ribakoff on October 20, 2009 - 10:53 pm
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Thanks, using your SOE technique I was able to boost my rank to platinum level rankpage